The last few weeks have felt like I was on an airplane. Ears popping, echoing, going silent. I put it down to the chest infection I've been trying to shake, and with a trip to England imminent I thought it was time to get it checked out.
Nobody likes earwax, it appears to be one of life's less celebrated emissions. There's no ear wax fairy for instance.
So when the doc said she thought that may be the problem I countered with my cough excuse. She hit me with, "No it's years of accumulation".
Fuck and Yuck.
So while I held the little plastic bowl of shame, the doc shot a hot syringe load into my ear canal. 39 years of stuff exited the freeway.
And now I can hear the sound of fabric against skin. It's like a pointless superpower. When I walk I sound like a hingeless futuristic door. Shussing all over the place.