Doctor, put down the water soluble lube and the latex gloves.
Yes indeed, it's my annual medical this morning.
As usual I will be told what my blood pressure is, and I will say "Is that good?". They will answer "It's average", and my internal speech bubble will say "Average? I'm not an international-class cyclist so 120/80 is pretty damn perfect".
My good cholesterol will be winning the battle against the evil cholesterol, and my di-glycerides will be whatever they are supposed to be.
We'll sketch over my 2 year repetitive strain issue, as there appears to be no cure for it, and then I'll be told to exercise more.
While my new doctor prods my balls I'll look up at the medical certificates on his wall. But I won't be able to work out if he went to a school that advocates prostrate checking at over 40, or over 50 until he asks me to pull my underwear back up.