Monday, January 13

Offending 1.2 billion people with one jerky movement

I started an 8 week beginner's guide to Tai Chi tonight.

Because when I grow up I want to be an old Chinese lady.

Thanks to my shitty commute I was a few minutes late, which cast me in an evil light in some of my fellow students' eyes.

We went through 24 or it may have been 32 (I stopped counting) of the Tai Chi Yang movements. We must have looked like a bunch of retarded robots in slow motion.

Our teacher gave an excellent analogy of chi. It's like an 8 lane highway, but over time some of the lanes get blocked until you're left with a single one lane road.

Our class represented the gaping chasm at the end of that single lane road into which your life-force is swallowed up in a quick and painful violent death.

There's no better way to get a small evening class going strong than by reminding the shy useless bunch that there is no class next week.

It's Martin Luther King Day, and boy did he hate Tai Chi.

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