Sunday, March 30

HR we have a problem

Saturday night our group of 8 headed for Rose.Rabbit.Lie.

Don't ask what it is. Even their website struggles.

For starters you eat over-priced tapas dishes while risqué cabaret acts perform by your table.

But post-dinner you enter a small theatre where before your eyes a cavalcade of craziness performs.

My favorite ... and I wish I had a video.

The Accountant
On walks a lady in a tweed 2-piece. She does the disappearing hanker-chief in the closed-fist hand trick. Only to reveal it is inside her jacket ... which she then removes. She does the trick 5 times. Jacket off. Skirt off. Bra off. Knickers off. Finally she pulls the hanky from out between her legs. Genius.

Also there was a contortionist in a big plastic sphere, tap-dancing dudes, spinning-wheel acrobats, a beat-boxing lady, and a guy who balanced on a tower of ever-decreasing-sized upturned buckets.

Oh, and a guy in a dragon outfit getting volunteers to shoot a chihuahua in the face.

The finale saw a burlesque-ish lady drum up money for a fake charity for kids abused by musical instruments? Through elaborate wordplay this pledge-drive created 2 acronyms. B.I.T.C.C.H, and C.U.U.N.T.S.

I think it was during the 23rd shouting of C.U.U.N.T.S. (and possibly amplified by the lady laying down, legs open, pointing at her cooch) that one of my co-workers walked out. I'm not sure because at that very moment a male member of the troupe was striding over the top of my seat in his Y-fronts with just a sliver of frayed cotton separating his ball-sack from my recently shampooed hair.

As a coup de grâce we were pelted with ping-pong balls.

I'll call HR on Monday.

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